The Birth of Hope (Conclusion)
"Where doubt is, there truth is, - it is her shadow." Ambrose Bierce.
This is the conclusion to my chapter entitled “The Birth of Hope.” My goal in these devotionals, as well as in my book, Masterpiece in the Making: Life Lessons for Spiritual Growth, is to share my own faith struggles honestly with you to help you become the disciple God is calling you to be through His Son, Jesus.
Something else that took place during this time helped me to rediscover hope. Not only that, but our entire family is stronger and closer because of this practice. It’s simple enough - I spent more time with my family. The problem is that so often when we face struggles in our workplaces or even in our homes, we withdraw from those closest to us. We need to do just the opposite. By surrounding ourselves with those who love and care for us, we receive healing.
God taught me this lesson through an unusual, if not somewhat humorous, set of circumstances. Sherri and I had just remodeled our home. We added a bedroom for my son, which allowed our two daughters their own bedrooms. (and probably kept them from killing each other!) Another addition was an expansion of the master bedroom, which included a large wood-burning fireplace, comfortable recliners, and an awesome television with surround sound. One of my friends dubbed our new bedroom “the bunker.” It was our plan to retreat into the bunker while our three teenagers shared the den. But that’s not how it worked out.
Like all pastor’s children, our kids were very aware of the struggles in our church, as well as the personal attacks leveled against their father. Those struggles left some deep, deep scars on all of us. I think that’s why the remodeled master bedroom became the new family den. It began with a child wandering in to see what Mom and Dad were doing. Before long, one, then two, and finally, all three teenagers were lying on the floor watching television and telling funny stories about Grandmother, Granddaddy, and Uncle Vince. We also learned to laugh at the trouble makers in the church. We were not being mean. Far from it, we were dealing with our pain and growing closer together as a family. Those days forged a strong bond that exists among us today. I thank God for my family.
In your despair and hopelessness, you cannot afford to close yourself off to others. Seek out friends and family. We need each other. Our enemy, the devil, is described as a roaring lion in the Bible. And like a lion, he prowls around, waiting until we are isolated, alone, and cut off. He strikes when and where we are most vulnerable.
I’ve witnessed many people over the years who have wandered into the darkness of hope lost, never to return. They remain to this day, masterpieces marred. Don’t isolate yourself from the very people God can use to fan that small spark of living hope within into a brightly burning flame.
In addition to daily rituals and family gatherings, God used something else to light the fires of hope and grow my faith. I’m a better follower of Jesus today because of my decision to fearlessly pursue my doubts.
This is important, and I really want you to get it. Doubts are a part of our relationship with God. They are the flip-side of faith and not to be ignored if we seek a deeper relationship with Christ. Our relationship with the Lord only grows as we learn to trust Him and share our deepest feelings and struggles with Him. Honesty and trust are essential in all real and growing relationships.
These things take time. They also require a willingness on our part to share our true feelings. And let me add something else. As we seek to honestly share our feelings with God, we discover more of our true selves. Some of this self-discovery is good, some of it is bad, and I’ll be honest, some of it is downright ugly. But as we, in the presence of God, honestly embrace ourselves, we find we are able to embrace Him as well. Best of all, we feel God embracing us back!
All of these rituals and relationships were important, but for me, the pursuit of my doubts was the real life-changer. Combined with my twelve years in Seoul ministering to and serving alongside believers from so many diverse cultures and Christian traditions, the fearless pursuit of my doubts has made me what I like to refer to as “bigger than Baptist.” In other words, I don’t just belong to the Baptist camp.
Richard Foster wrote an excellent book, entitled, “Streams of Living Water.” In it, he demonstrates the strengths of our various Christian traditions and denominations. I experienced those refreshing streams during my years in Korea.
My last Sunday in Seoul, after the church called their new pastor, I attended the English Mass at the Roman Catholic church. I became good friends with Brother Daniel, a monk who served for forty years caring for aids patients as a nurse in Korea. We met through a mutual acquaintance who owned a local French Bistro.
Yeonjin had left her Christian faith for the same reason so many do these days, she saw the ugly side of church life, and she failed to experience God in the churches she attended. But together, that day, Brother Daniel, Yeonjin, and I attended Mass. Afterward, I enjoyed one last meal in Korea with these two wonderful friends. And Yeonjin is now searching for a living faith and a living hope.
The hammer and chisel of the Divine Sculptor during those three agonizing years seemed endless and unbearable, at times, but the trials did come to an end. And when they did, God took a deep breath and blew the dust off His masterpiece in the making. Large areas of faithlessness and flesh had been chiseled away, and something good could be seen emerging from the stone of my life. God also blew me, my wife, and our three incredibly strong children to new places with endless opportunities. New chapters have been written in each of our lives - chapters filled with anticipation, dreams, and hopes.
Remember the words of scripture, “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” (Ephesians 2:10)
God’s next chapter for your life is written, but you’ve got to finish the one you’re in now. The living hope of God’s Spirit burning within, however dim it may seem, will help you turn each page and finish every chapter until you have become once and for all His masterpiece.
In Christ,
Dan